Killer Donkeys...

Today marks the second time in as many weeks that a donkey was the focal point of an attempt on my life. While pissed and slightly embarrassed I allow myself to be put in these situations, it is worth mentioning.
I was walking from my apartment to the Mecca Mall to enjoy some authentic Jordanian food for dinner – KFC – when I noticed a donkey standing on the side of the highway. Now, Amman is not Petra. The city does not have an abundance of “air-conditioned taxis” trotting along the streets, so in and of itself, I found it to be bizarre that a donkey was standing quietly on the side of a very busy highway. Then, I noticed the donkey was not alone, but was standing on top of a man – or rather, the donkey stood there while a man slid underneath the animal. Again, bizarre, but not completely outrageous. But then, I saw quite distinctly that the man had a frickin’ wrench in his hand, and appeared to be, in one way or another, “working” on his “ride.”
While this was happening, I was simultaneously consumed with crossing the said highway. As many of you know from previous posts, not an easy task even for the sharpest of people. Now, the highway, naturally, has two sides to is divided by a barrier. The roads are one way on each side. So, while crossing, it only makes sense to look in the direction of the oncoming traffic. I learned the hard way that in Jordan, nothing is as it seems. As I quite professionally mapped out my path through the traffic while curiously watching the man “fine tune” his donkey, I logically didn’t notice the sole car driving backwards into the oncoming traffic! Apparently, when people miss their turn in Jordan, you don’t drive back around as in America. You hit the brakes, back it up, and make your turn. How was I supposed to know I was supposed to account for the possibility of reversals when I made my mad dash through traffic? Perhaps if I had my wits about me and wasn’t fully consumed by a man, his donkey, and a wrench, I could have sensed my impending doom, but alas, I was too intrigued by the soft squeal let out by the donkey as one of his lug nuts was tightened back into place. As it were, the car missed my toes by about two and a half inches, and I certainly learned an invaluable lesson. Even as my Englarabic improves ever so slightly, my skills in cultural communication is far from fluent.
In other news, a big music festival is set to take place in Amman this summer, and yet several of the artists are beginning to back out, citing, “Normalization with Israel.” Interesting that even in the one country on good terms with Israel, it is practically taboo to give the impression you are interested in peace. Unfortunately for Jordan, it sits directly in the middle of Iran and Israel, meaning any potential missile that falls in the event of a future conflict had better be accurate, and Jordanians had better be praying that the winds are blowing out to sea. Perhaps more than any other nation in the Middle East, it would be extremely beneficial to the future survival of the country if Israel were to normalize its relation with the rest of the region. This, however, appears to be extremely wishful thinking.
To end things, let me impart a little bit of wisdom passed down from my Grandfather’s own worldly experiences: “It’s not always in your best interest to pet a sleeping walrus just to make sure it isn’t dead.”